The Four Walls We Build with Cynicism

I’m overly cynical and I live in a world of overly cynical creatives. Call us a product of companies overselling to us consumers. Call us a product of watching people we admire reveal their hidden agendas. Call us a product of our own self-awareness. Whatever caused it doesn’t matter. What we are left with is a world of untrusting, jaded individuals and that includes myself.

I have a group of friends that I give permission on a regular basis to provide feedback on my character. One of my friends once told me he didn’t feel comfortable ever sharing music he loves with me because I always have a pre-formed opinion of their motives based off the genre or the way they look. It was a great moment for me to realize that labeling artists by way of my cynicism was a personal character liability.

Being a cynic and being a creative can be an insufferable combination, and I’m actively working to fix that. I’ve become aware watching others cynics being cynical of others shuts people off to their personal work. They lose opportunities to connect because of this negative trait. I believe there are four walls cynicism builds between us and the world.

WALL ONE 

Being cynical of the creative efforts of others raises the expectation of your own work.

If you have the confidence to be outwardly cynical of others, then you better be ready to bring something amazing to the table. If you jump on social media as an author and rail another author’s work, you better be prepared to deliver something better. I don’t have data behind this, but I’m convinced hyper cynical people on social media produce less content than those that aren’t because they’ve called for standards that even they can’t obtain in their own work.

WALL TWO

You forget that those creating content are real people with real emotions.

I remember when I first saw Listener live. After the first song, I made the poor judgement call that I thought they seemed pretentious and they were trying too hard to be different. After the show, a friend and I ran into the guys from Listener and within two minutes, I realized I made a huge mistake. These guys were the real deal: humble, funny and gracious. Who was I to make such a hasty judgement? I judged them as a product, or an act, before I met them as real people with real emotions and convictions.

WALL THREE

You miss out on life-changing experiences.

For the most part, life change doesn’t happen in safe, comfortable, routine experiences. Life change happens in the midst of unfamiliar cultures, unpredictable circumstances and in conversations with strangers. When you are constantly cynical, you close yourself off to experiencing life from different vantage points. You miss out on becoming a better version of yourself.

WALL FOUR

You miss out on career opportunities.

I sometimes wonder if the most verbally cynical people realize how many potential employers have already written them off with one search through their social media profile. What’s to make a potential employer think you will be any less unnecessarily cynical within their organization?

I believe us overly cynical individuals look at it as a personal asset and not a personal liability.

“It’s a defense mechanism.”

“It protects us from those who would try to take advantage of us.”

Because of this viewpoint, not many of us feel like it’s a characteristic we should be actively eradicating in our lives, which is disappointing. If you feel like you’ve become an overly cynical person, THIS article may help you tackle the issue.

Be kind, give people the benefit of the doubt, search for the root of your pessimism. It may open you up to new experiences and opportunities.